Dearest Jenna,I almost choked on my low carb bagel just now. Honey, this may just be the worst eye makeup I have ever witnessed first hand. Worse even than a thin strip of chalk white shadow on the upper lash line of a brown-skinned chick (soooo effin wrong). Sure, you're a porn star extraordinaire. Therefore, my style expectations for you are pretty much non-existent. But this is beyond my comprehension. Seriously, poptart, you look like an komodo dragon. That makeup would only be appropriate had you tucked your twig and berries into a couture gown and worked the runway at drag ball to 'Let No Man Put Asunder.' Do us all a favor and fire your makeup artist, stat. He/she obviously can't be trusted.
Luh you boo,
Elle
