Breeding for Bags?

Someone get PETA on the horn! French luxury brand, Hermès, maker of such handbag classics as the Birkin and the Kelly, has begun breeding its own crocodiles to keep up with what the label calls "massive over-demand" for handbags. Even in this economic downturn, leather bags continue to be the label's fastest-growing product line. Since it can take three to four crocodiles to make one handbag (WOW), the brand is finding it uber-difficult to make the required 3,000 bags a year. Customers must sometimes be wait-listed for years before snapping up bags made from exotic skins, costing upwards of $48,410 apiece!

Hmmm. As beautiful as these bags are, there is something unseemly about the prospect of farming crocs for the sole purpose of creating luxury goods. Food is one thing, but for fashion? This has made me rethink my love affair with fur! (But you will still need to pry it from my cold, dead hands before I give that up).

What say you?

P.S. Want a Hermes bag without the guilt? Check out this fun DIY project on the Hermes corporate Website. Download, cut and paste your own paper Kelly bag! A perfectly chic way to dress up any mantle, desk or vanity.

Source (via Reuters)

Quote of the Day

"You don't...go to Buckingham Palace in a sweater."

-Oscar de la Renta on the First Lady's palace attire

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Pam Anderson for Vivienne Westwood

File this under "hmmmm....." The one and only Pamela Anderson is the face (and breasts) of couture queen Vivienne Westwood's Spring/Summer 2009 campaign. The pics were shot in Malibu by photog Juergen Teller, who responsible for many of Marc Jacobs' quirky adverts. Suprisingly, Dame Vivienne actually makes an appearance in a few shots alongside Anderson.

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Ummmm, I have nothing against Pam Anderson but she doesn't exactly make me want to invest in high fashion. In fact, I'm hoping the pieces used here were subsequently burned. I suppose she does bring a certain amount of necessary drama to these shots, but overall, it's a no.

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What do you think? Appropriately avante garde or a match made in Hepatitis hell?

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WTFug? Top Design's Kelly Wearstler

If you're a fan of Bravo's Top Design, or like me, consider it a last resort when there's absolutely nothing else on, you've been exposed to the clusterf*ck of couture that is Kelly Wearstler. Week after week, she leaves me dazed, confused and mildly entertained with her fashion choices. I looove a fashion risk-taker, but even I have my limits. And it's not just the clothes that are the conundrum, it's mostly her hair and accessories that take her style from cool to kuh-razy. Crimps and beehives, top hats and turbans...Kelly, you are a mess of all proportions.

The Worst-ler had this to say about her Top Design style: “I never go out, but I have all these great outfits. So I was just like, 'Fuck it, I’m just going to wear them.'” I kind of love her for that. But this does not excuse the boosheet below. Look and LOL.







Okay, I'm actually not too mad at this outfit, minus the fingerless gloves and wierd side bang.

Kelly-boo, it's clear that you have some fabulous statement pieces in your closet but the key is not wearing them all at once! Back away from the crimper and please stop playing eenie meenie miney mo with your wardrobe. Thanks.

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F for effort

No...

No... and NO! Damn you all to hell.

asdf

Love, hugs and psychodelic drugs, Elle

asdfads


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Mimi Lives in Never Never Land...

Mimi on Monday's TRL

...right next to Peter Pan. Cuz b*tch don't want to grow old! In case you were wondering, Mariah Carey is STILL dressing like this. At damn near 40. In 2008. I can't. I still hold on to the hope that one day, she will wake up, put on a proper dress and repent for all of her sins against fashion. But alas, not this day. I hate everything about her look...except the bangles. She can keep those.

Seriously though, who wears tied-up belly shirts any more? And with a three-tone mini? I even hate her in those sunglasses. And I wish she would do something new with her hair already. It's doing nothing for her face (she's got great cheekbones). Everything about her look says immature and insecure. Grow up, girl! Forty ain't the new 20, Mariah, it's the same old 40!

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Ashanti looks home sewn

Ashanti appeared on 106 and Park on Thursday sounding like the black Fran Drescher (Fresh is a mess) and looking like the black Judy Jetson in blue Balenciaga from the Spring 2007 collection. Hmmm...why do I suddenly have deja vu? Where where where have I seen this dress before?

Ah, yes! The dress made completely from plastic cups from the first episode of this season's Project Runway! Yikes. Not a good look.

Dayum Crystle!!!

Miss Crystle at Miss USA

I smell a 'spiracy! Someone must be greasing the heels of the Miss USA contestants at the Miss Universe pageant! This is the second year in a row that Miss USA has slipped and fallen right on her bum during the evening gown competition! Poor poor Crystle Stewart...I had high hopes for you, boo!

I blame myself. I was already replaying Rachel Smith's fall from grace at Miss Universe 2007 in my mind while watching and waiting for Crystle to make her bootylicious appearance in her evening gown. I guess I'm not the only one. The power of the collective mind is a crazy thing! Bam! She goes down! They are SO not letting a black girl win Miss USA next year.

I guess congrats are in order for Crystle making the Top 10 though. She didn't make the Top 5, unlike Rachel Smith who got fourth runner-up despite her fall and to the dismay of the host country, Mexico, whose own contestant failed to make the cut.

Did anybody else see it live? If not, I'm quite sure by the time you read this it will be on YouTube. Dayum Crystle!!!

Natural beauty my arse

Okay, I just heard some of the craziest sh*t ever, and I simply must share. A friend of a friend of mine, who is only mildly attractive in the first place (and I'm putting that nicely), doesn't ever wear makeup. Although this is highly offensive to my sensibilities, I get it. Not everyone is into accentuating their natural assets with a lil gloss from time to time, fine. Personally, I can't comprehend this, but like my father says, if you like it, I love it.

But here is where I had to put my foot down. This same young lady did not wear a stitch of makeup ON HER WEDDING DAY. None. I swear I've been walking around with a furrowed brow every since I learned this sad fact (I'm totally sending her my Botox bill this month). Like, how does something like this happen? Of all days in a woman's life, you don't decide to dab a little blush on before you walk down the aisle? I can only think of a few reasons how and why something like this could happen.

1. You have no friends, cousins, play cousins, aunts, or sisters and your mama is dead. Because one of the above should have snatched you up in a fit of rage and dragged you to the nearest MAC counter.

2. You're allergic to makeup. Whatevs, okay, this is no excuse. There are plenty of hypoallergenic products out there and the organic ingredients in mineral makeup have become a great option for people with cosmetic allergies or sensitive, problematic skin types. It's your wedding day...make it work!

3. You're a lesbian. 'Nuff said.

4. Someone lied to you and told you you were a natural beauty. Even the most beautifullest girl in this world can use a little zsujsh on her wedding day. And even if you look great in person without makeup, pictures are a whole 'nother story. Hello...you will be looking at these pictures for the rest of your life! A shiny forehead and ashy lips will really take away from your wedding album.

5. Your fiance/husband doesn't like when you wear makeup. Chile, please. This is YOUR day. Eff him. And anyway, the real truth is that women dress up and wear makeup for other women, even on their wedding day.

6. You really and truly don't care. And hey, if you don't care enough to get glammed up on your wedding day, then why should I? However, the next time I run into you in the street, and we stop and exchange pleasantries, and I begin to rustle around in the bottom of my handbag du jour, just know that I am searching for one of my opera-length gloves with which to backslap you. That's all.

Over the top much?

Sarah Jessica Parker at the SATC premiere in London

I'm all for a dramatic, colorful, scene stealing hat but really, SJP, this is just ridiculous.

That being said, I'd totally wear it.

UPDATE via People:

What was premier milliner [So it's not so useless after all! - Elle] Philip Treacy thinking when he designed that love-it-or-hate-it hat Sarah Jessica Parker wore to Monday night’s world premier of Sex and the City: The Movie? “Well, his mother kept chickens and geese, so he loves feathers and manipulating feathers,” Treacy’s spokeswoman Nina Farnell-Watson explains to PEOPLE. Treacy was approached last week about making the hat — not, says Farnell-Watson, by film stylist Patricia Field but “by someone else.” He received photos of her Alexander McQueen dress and then met with the actress at her London hotel Sunday for about an hour. She tried on some different hat shapes and “found the one she loved,” says Farnell-Watson. Treacy then worked for two days straight and “very late into the night” trimming it with peacock feathers he got from McQueen. (They’re the same plumage used to trim her dress.) Parker — who had no idea what Treacy was planning — first saw the finished hat about two hours before the premiere. “Quite brave of her,” notes Farnell-Watson. “It’s the most beautiful crazy hat and it’s so great that she wore a hat to a British premiere. The hat is such a quintessentially English idea, but it was done in such a Carrie Bradshaw way.” And yes, Parker gets to keep it.

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These two can't be serious

I can't. But I must. For the love of fashion, I will dignify this relationship with a post. I kept waiting for this whole story to show up on Pop Fiction but no such luck. Dammit.

So for the shenanigans, the twosome chose to wear matching off white, him in a Balenciaga tux and her in an ankle length form fitting gown by Nile Cmylo. “And Louboutins — I can wear high heels with Nick because he’s tall. Flats are not in my repertoire,” said Mrs. Mimi. Excuse me while I vomit.

I'm actually suprised that Mariah went so old-school glam. No cleavage? No leg? No diamond encrusted tiara? I'm shocked.

Let's hope the marriage lasts as long as her "Mrs. Cannon" tattoo.

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Louis Vuitton doesn't care about black people

Paris? Is that you?

Controversial Danish artist Nadia Plesner is being sued by Louis Vuitton for copyright infringement as a result of her Simple Living campaign, which is meant to raise money and awareness around the genocide in Darfur. The campaign features a stirring image that really illustrates the nonsensical world we live in, where in the midst of the ongoing genocide of an entire nation of people, the mainstream media would rather provide Breaking News updates everytime Paris Hilton falls or farts.

I agree with Miss Brigette. Really, LV, your bags have already been (and will continue to be) knocked off left, right, up, down and center. Why not establish some goodwill by using those legal fees to make a donation to an organization that's helping Darfur?

You can buy a t-shirt or poster with the image and help out the cause, here.

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I can't cosign

Just hell no. Darling MK, labels aren't everything. Just because it's Marc Jacobs, doesn't mean you should wear a fur sweatband. With a vintage Missoni gown no less. My brain is struggling for an answer. I'm thinking homegirl must be on that happy crack. It's popular with the shorties these days. Don't snort the Kool-Aid, Mary-Kate!

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Make it Stop!

Um...are those palazzo pants!?!

I give up. No more pseudo-celebrity clothing lines! They can't be trusted. More importantly, I don't think my delicate stomach can take it. Just looking at these ungodly tops is making me itch.

No, Scary Spice isn't posing at a swap meet, she has "designed" a truly scary collection entitled...wait for it...Catty Couture, which is based on her own wardrobe. LOLZ for days! Is she serious with all that cheetah? Sure, into every life a little animal print must fall, but this is ridiculous.

The last thing the world needs is more cheap and tacky clothes, and in animal print no less. There's already a Rainbow on every corner in the hood.

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What's Going On Here?

Last night, Veronica Webb served as hostess with the mostest at a cocktail party in NYC. Mostest scarves, that is. Honey, what happened here? There is a whole lot going on and none of it is good. I'm all for interesting color combinations but somewhere between the monochromatic dress and tights combo, those shoes, and that necklace, this entire look went terribly wrong. Well, V. Webb, they can't all be shining moments!


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Oh No He Didn't

How dare you

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Mr. Blackwell, perhaps it's time for you to put it in a seat. For the 48th time, the senile diva has announced his Annual Worst Dressed Women list, and had the nerve to put my muse, inspiration and current love of my fashion life, Eva Green, on the list! For shame.

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Here's what he (and his writers) had to say:

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10.) Alison Arngrim: "Little Nellie of the prairie, looks like a 1940's fashion editor for the Farmers Almanac." [Who? -Elle]

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9.) Lindsay Lohan: "Lindsay the fashion frenzy strikes again! Lohan takes fashion to a new low."

8.) Jessica Simpson: "Forget the Cowboys. In prom queen screams, can it get any worse? She's a global fashion curse!"

7.) Avril Lavigne: "Gothic make-up courtesy the mad spatula-Fashions provided by.. The house of Dracula!" [Agreed. -Elle]

6.) Eva Green: "Stuck in neon nightmares not fit for the sane. Fashion this loud could give Bond a migraine! A profusion of confusion from toes to nose!"

5.) Kelly Clarkson: "Her heavenly voice soars above the rest... but those belly-baring bombs are hellish at best! She may be the queen of 'Pro-Active' – but that wardrobe looks downright radioactive!"

4.) Fergie: "Another style-free 'Fergie' in fashion's hall of shame? Yes, when it comes to couture chaos, guess it's all in a name!"

3.) Mary Kate Olsen: "YIKES! In layers of cut-rate kitsch, Mary Kate's look is hard to explain... she resembles a tattered toothpick-trapped in a hurricane!"

2.) Amy Winehouse: "Exploding beehives above…tacky polka-dots below... she's part 50's car-hop horror."

1.) Victoria Beckham: "Forget the fashion spice - wearing a skirt would suffice! In one skinny-mini monstrosity after another, pouty posh can really wreck-em."

Actually, if I were Eva, I'd be happy I made the list. You're nobody until you've made Mr. Blackwell's worst dressed!

asdfasdf

Source, Scans via RCFA

For the Love of Fashion...NO!

You don't know what you've got till it's gone...

The Golden Globes are officially a wrap. Faced with the prospect of zero celebrities and picketing writers, NBC will instead be showing some craptastic filler and a press conference to announce the winners. Why lord? I understand there's a writer's strike going on but what is a fashion blogger to do with no Golden Globes red carpet? Hello? Can anybody out there hear me? This is a tragedy of epic proportions. Someone pass the Zoloft.

You know you want some lip chap

As promised, Flavor of Love chick and Charm School winner, Saaphyri, has launched a line of lip balm called...Lip Chap. I am so ashamed. Available in Mojito, Cookie Dough, Pina Colada, Bubblegum and Wintergreen flavors, it's probably very soothing after having to knock a b*tches block off. Saaphyri also has that good indian hair for you. I feel like she should be selling these items out of the back of her car. I can't knock her hustle though!

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Hello Kitty for guys?

Starting next month, Japan's Sanrio Co. will begin targeting young men with the uber-popular Hello Kitty brand. A collection of T-shirts, bags and watches featuring a "more rugged, cool" Kitty is set to appeal to men in their teens and early 20s.

Company spokesman Kazuo Tohmatsu says, “We think Hello Kitty is accepted by young men as a design statement in fashion...Young men these days grew up with character goods...That generation feels no embarrassment about wearing Hello Kitty.”

Even though I'm shaking my head at this, I'm quite sure it will do well in Tokyo where men's clothing tends to be more androgynous and eccentric. And I can also envision some men here in the U.S. snapping for the kids in a tight Hello Kitty tee. What do you think about this? A must or a bust?

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Is that a pimp cup?

Luenell in all her splendor

And are those shoes lucite? It's clear that Catherine Malandrino's tips for holiday dressing came a day too late for Luenell. I could spend a few hours dissecting all of the ways she has gone wrong here. But in the interest of my eyesight, I will merely point out that I don't think I've ever seen pink fur on someone over the age of 5. First time for everything.